Thursday, December 17, 2015, marks two years since Lilly’s death. I remain devastated. It isn’t the all day, every day, kind of grief, but when it bubbles up, it feels just as fresh and raw and searing as ever. On this anniversary, I thought I would share some insights into what it’s really like to be this FAR into the grieving process. Don’t worry. Some of them are kind of funny. This post isn’t entirely sad. And, there are even photos of the puppies — Clover and Tori.
Friday, October 9, after a LONG wait for Clover to go into heat (in hopes of solving her UTI issues) and then more waiting for her to recover from an exceptionally long false pregnancy that lasted WAY longer than a real one, Clover will be spayed. I’m very much looking forward to having this surgery behind us, but I’m also a total wreck. Once you’ve lost an amazing dog to something that should have been routine (a rabies vaccine), it’s hard to look at anything — big or small — as no big deal.
I’m forever amused at the estimates circulated in the media about the costs of having a dog in your family. The annual figures shared by major pet or veterinary organizations always feel WAY TOO LOW. So, I decided to test that theory and keep track of my puppy spending from Clover’s adoption on September 13, 2014, through her Gotcha Day anniversary, September 13, 2015. Are you ready to see what it really costs to bring a puppy home (at least home to a family like mine)?
The dogs in my life have always been PIGS. Serious P-I-G pigs. It’s helpful because if they won’t eat, then you KNOW something is wrong. Really wrong. Enter our new canine heroine, Clover Lee Hawn, who for about a month now has NOT been eating well. It’s STRESSING me out. So, when our friends and sponsors at Purina asked me to write about the new “natural” version of their veterinary diets for pets with tummy upset, I agreed. More about Clover’s tummy, two cool infographics, and a Q&A with Purina’s veterinary diet experts … just ahead.
Now that Clover is a year old and demonstrating more maturity, we’re giving her a bit more SUPERVISED independence — like letting her run around a little bit in our front pastures. This independence nearly landed her in the Emergency Room over the weekend. I’m still astounded she didn’t get hurt. When you see the photos, you’ll understand.
Based on my history with dogs, it seems I’m not allowed to have ones that are 100% healthy on arrival. So, when we got the call a week before Clover’s anticipated flight to Colorado telling us she had a urinary tract infection, we weren’t surprised. No biggie, we thought. Get her on meds, and we’ll take care of the rest from here. After weeks and weeks and weeks of meds, when the UTI remained, we headed off to see the veterinary specialist.
This week, I’d planned on writing an update about how Ginko is doing health-wise and without Lilly. I prepared to say he was doing OK with his heart and neurological issues. I intended to whine a bit about his ongoing senile barking. I planned to tell you that he does seem perhaps a little lonely without Lilly, but that he also smiles an awful lot. Then, seemingly out of nowhere Sunday, Ginko’s tummy had some serious, serious troubles. Fair warning, long post.
A few weeks ago, a 3-month-old puppy appeared in my Facebook newsfeed. Cue instant yearning — even though I’m nowhere near ready and she was about 900 miles away. I squealed. I shared her pix. My friends encouraged me. Adopt. Adopt. ADOPT, they told me. Something about her face called to me. Something in her eyes beckoned. I convinced myself it meant something.
On June 23, 2013, after a 6-day, whirlwind hospice vigil (ending to a long, long illness), my mom died from PSP, a rare, fatal brain disease. That’s why the blog sits silent. After a total of 3 weeks off for hospice / bereavement leave, I’m in triage mode in every area of my life. It’s hard to resume the day-to-day demands, while under the crushing weight of grief. Below you’ll find my tributes to my mommio and a few brief health updates about our intrepid canine heroine.
Honestly. Every time I think Lilly’s medical saga cannot get any worse, something else that’s unexpected / unwelcome happens. On top of the not-good kidney news from earlier this week, on top of figuring out Lilly still has high blood pressure (even though she has been on BP meds since February 2012) … Lilly received an accidental “overdose” of cytarabine (a chemo drug) Wednesday night.
