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Dog With Brain Inflammation – What I Won’t Miss

You knew it was coming. As much as I try really hard not to be a purveyor of gloom, there are some really awful parts to taking care of a very sick dog for so very long. Here’s what I won’t miss … at all!

flat lilly on the tile 8-14-13 -- what I won't miss


What I Won’t Miss

  • Seeing my once lithe, muscular puppy-girl look like a swollen, uncomfortable blob
  • The worry of having such a dangerously ill dog
  • The dread that any given day may be The Day
  • The stress of managing her day-to-day care — with meds required 5 times a day
  • The strain of the expense and its budget-crushing reality
  • Not sleeping past 4:30-5:00 am — ever
  • Having feces and urine be the first thing I smell each morning (and often throughout the day)
  • Feeling like I’m always covered in grossness
  • Doing far too much incontinence laundry every day
  • Expressing Lilly’s eliminations (both ways) several times every day (always ME because Tom can’t do it and is afraid he’ll hurt her)
  • Changing soiled diapers
  • Cleaning up a messy, stinky girl that I love so very much
  • Walking around all day bent over, trying to help, cajole, encourage Lilly as she walks
  • The guilt that all this begin with a routine rabies vaccine (well, that may never go away)
  • Waiting by the phone for test results (presumably bad news)
  • Feeling like I cannot leave the house for long
  • Always rushing to get back home
  • The preemptive heartbreak of knowing we cannot win
  • Feeling like other people think I’m a drama queen
  • Being too tired to do much more than work and take care of Lilly
  • Feeling like I cannot have fun because there is too much going on
  • Constantly having to step around Lilly who often gets stuck, visually / cognitively / physically in one spot — and when I forget or misstep, popping her in the head or mouth with my legs

Other posts in this series:

Roxanne Hawn

Trained as a traditional journalist and based in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado, USA, I'm a full-time freelance writer for magazines, websites, and private clients. My areas of specialty include everything in the lifestyles arena, including health and home, personal finance and other consumer interests, relationships and trends, people and business profiles ... and, of course, all things pet related. I don't just love dogs. I need them in my life. Seriously.

Nancy - November 14, 2013

I relate to so many things on your list, as my dog Carly (2 year old Pug) suffers from meningoencephalitis too. I won’t that she can’t go outside on walks any more because she may catch something. I won’t miss taking her to the vet several times a month, as she hyperventilates in the car because she suffers from anxiety. I won’t miss laundering her “pee towels” every day. I also have to be home five times a day for meds – fortunately I work from home. I could go on and on but you basically covered it all on your list. Most of all, I won’t miss having sad thoughts about missing Carly. I try and stay in the moment, but quite frankly I hate when people tell me to do that because they need to walk in my shoes for a day and see what it’s like to love someone so much and know that they won’t make it. I’m so glad I found your website!

Jane Boursaw - September 26, 2013

You’re both following your heart and doing the hard work, both physically and mentally. Hugs to you.
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Eileen - September 26, 2013

Heartbreaking stuff.
Hugs to you and Lilly x

Hilary - September 26, 2013

<3 I can totally understand. You're doing what you can, and I know Lilly is doing the best she can… thanks for writing this. Hugs, Rox.

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