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August 27, 2007

The research that first ranked dog breeds by intelligence essentially measured how many exposures it took for various dogs to learn something new. Border collies, as you’ve likely heard, were (and often are) touted as the “smartest” dogs. Now, I don’t know about smartest … as in smarter than every other dog in the world, but Lilly is very smart, and she is certainly smarter than any dog I’ve had.

I cruised through that old breed research a while back, and as I recall, border collies often learn new things in as few as 5 exposures. Based on my 2+ years with Lilly, I’d say that’s true for tasks. When it comes to “scary” things or me trying to outwit Lilly for toe nail trims or baths, then the learning curve (sadly for me) is much shorter … like 1-2 exposures.

Lately, for example, I’ve been using the Turkey-for-Toe nails method. For each nail Lilly lets me cut, she gets a piece of turkey. Simple. Sort of.

I’ve tried all manner of body positions to align my cutting hand with her feet — front, side, over the top, under the chin. Each one works once, maybe twice, before I have to come up with a new strategy. Last week, for example, I tried sitting behind Lilly and reaching around in a hug to get her back toe nails. It worked, but I bet next time I try to snuggle with her that way she’ll give me that suspicious face.

To combat that association, I’ve started sitting behind her to massage her back and shoulders and hips. She’s nearly all muscle, so I figure it probably feels pretty good to her. I’ve done the same with her front feet. She likes to have her front paws rubbed in a flat swirling motion, like a paw pancake with my hands above and below hers. She’ll keep offering me alternating paws for as long as 30 minutes. Plus, we get to practice her Shake and Other Hand cues.

It’s funny to see her do this to other people. They think she wants to shake, but she really wants her feet rubbed. I try to explain and show them the method, but it isn’t long before Lilly gives me that they-just-don’t-get-it face.

This summer, I thought I was super smart when I figured out the Pond-Play-Bath method. I throw Lilly’s ball into the pond. She gets soaked, swimming out to get it. I soap her up on the bank when she returnss, then I rinse her with a pitcher from either a bucket of house water or the pond. It worked beautifully …. twice. That’s it.

I tried it again this weekend with no luck. She got the ball once, but when I reached for her and the soap, she sprinted off.

With Tom’s help, I caught up with her near the baby pool we keep under a down spout to catch rain water. I soaped her and rinsed her there with some success. But, I finally had to get a couple really wet towels and wipe her down.

I try to be so clever to find ways of doing doggie maintenance tasks in a way that Lilly tolerates, but it’s getting harder and harder.

So, while I do enjoy how easy it is to teach Lilly new tricks, for example, I’m not so keen on how fast she gets my number when I try to fool her into something else.

I’m left with this question … would I rather have a dumb-clean dog or a smart-occassionally stinky one?

P.S. I make soap sometimes, including a pet-shampoo bar. It smells good and leaves the coat really shiny. Maybe I should have a contest or something and the winner can have some soap. Holler if you have any ideas for a funny contest.

About the Author Roxanne Hawn

Trained as a traditional journalist and based in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado, USA, I'm a full-time freelance writer for magazines, websites, and private clients. My areas of specialty include everything in the lifestyles arena, including health and home, personal finance and other consumer interests, relationships and trends, people and business profiles ... and, of course, all things pet related.

I don't just love dogs. I need them in my life. Seriously.

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