Yesterday morning Bobbye, my friend and neighbor for more than a decade, died. Bobbye gave lung cancer (non-small cell) one heck of a fight for nearly 5 years. Diagnosed in March 2007, she used cutting-edge treatments to stretch the horizon again and again. So many times, we fielded calls with dire news. Yet, Bobbye came out the other side, beating the odds in innumerable ways.
I told her a few weeks ago, after she’d come home in hospice care, how bummed I was that the preemptive radiation the doctors did on her brain didn’t “work.” In other words, the cancer still spread to her noggin. She replied, “It got me 2 more years.”
After the holiday, I’d planned to post something funny. I promise I will post the funny stuff soon … just not today.
As I’ve done before when my friend Jody died in 2007, I wrote a little tribute I’d like to share. Bobbye, as context for regular readers, lived with these three funny golden retrievers.
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Lessons from Bobbye Lee Sperrazza
July 9, 1956 – November 27, 2011
Optimism doesn’t come all at once. Instead, it grows moment to moment.
Don’t over-invest in good news or bad news.
Advocates come in many forms, including the right husband.
Big, silly, fetch-obsessed dogs make life better.
Buying yourself more time is never a waste of time,
even if the outcome is the same.
Purchase a good winter coat and at least a few
cute-but-impractical pairs of shoes.
Say “thank you” even when you cannot talk.
Every year, every day, matters.
When you need to leave — be it on vacation or otherwise — it’s OK to go.
Hello all… As we take the time to allow ourselves to grieve, it is equally important to allow skylarking of our own lives. It is as the seasons that complete a circle… we too, are as those seasons. Even if some journeys are shorter (or longer) than others, the cycle of our seasons will be completed. Celebrate that Bobbye has completed her earth journey. Celebrate as we all continue to ascend on our own journeys.
Rox,
Thank you for the loving tribute to my wife. I believe you captured her philosophy of life perfectly in your list of lessons.
Many thanks, again, to you and Tom for all of your support and love over the years.
With great sadness,
Joe Sperrazza
You wrote a beautiful tribute. I’m so sorry that she’s gone from this earth but it sounds like she lived a full and joyous life.
I am so sorry for your loss. Prayers go out to you and her family.
She sounds like a great lady – we are so sorry for your loss.
Sam
I’m so sorry for your loss. I know you’ve been holding Bobbye in your heart all through her illness. I know you’ll continue to hold her in your memories.
I’m so sorry you lost your friend. It’s so hard, I know. She’s lucky to have had you in her life; I’m sure you made her feel loved and cared for.
So, so sorry, Roxanne. Bobbye sounds like somebody I would have loved to know.
I love how souls are so much more than the flesh they embody briefly. Energy is neither created nor destroyed, allowing me to receive and enjoy the gifts of your friend even after her body serves her no more. Thanks for sharing the precious essence of her here.
I’m very sorry for your loss. It’s so sweet of you to post your tribute to her. I’m sure she would have appreciated it.
this is a fine remembrance of your friend, Rox. she lives on in the love and lessons she shared with all who knew her, and in your sharing of her beyond that circle of friends, too.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Rox. It sounds like the world lost a very cool person. She was just two days younger than Rod, and that makes me grateful that we’re living the way we’ve chosen. There are no guaranties in life.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Any time is too soon to lose the ones you care about. I’m glad your friend gave the people who loved her a little extra time to let her know how they felt — and to thank them.
So sorry about your loss. It makes me so angry when I read about people dying of cancer before their time. We need to clean up the environment and become more savvy on cancer prevention. We did it with cigarettes, but I know people who never smoked and died of lung cancer. The daughter of one of these people told me her mom used to play in a field regularly sprayed with pesticides.
I’m so sorry, Rox. Last night a good friend of mine passed away so your post was just what I needed today.
I’m so sorry, Roxanne, but what a tribute she left in the lessons she taught. Hugs.
Roxanne, I’m so sorry for your loss. She sounds like a fabulous person.
This is beautiful and I’m sad for you and her family.
I love that she left such a lasting impression. That’s a lot for one person to teach others. Every day i walk by the grave of a woman I never knew. In her headstone it says “Make Today Count.” She died at age 40, a year younger than I am now. I talk to her every morning and tell her that I will make the day count. It’s a gift that she left for others, that inscription.
Oh, Rox. I’m so sorry you’ve lost such a great person in your life.
This is a beautiful tribute to a person who will be missed by many. I am deeply sorry for your loss as well as the world’s.