Champion of My HeartA real-time memoir about life with a fearful border collie, by Roxanne Hawn

For example, rather than just letting her follow me up and down the stairs as I do laundry. I ask her to SIT-STAY while I load the washer. I release her when it’s time to move. I ask her to SLOW when we go up the stairs together. I ask her to DOWN-STAY off the bed while I put on fresh sheets.

I reward these daily activities, just as if we were doing new training tasks, and I have to say that Lilly honestly responds like it is real work. And, we all know how much she loves to work.

So, even if it’s a simple HOP UP (where she settles on the bed), I ask her to do something as much as I can so that we can engage in a deeper human-canine communication than when she just follows me around hoping for a little interaction.

Her latest thing is bringing me sticks while I soak outside in the hot tub. She gets to play fetch. I get to relax … at the same time.

I really am trying to make more time to play and walk and work with her the few hours I have to myself each day. And, as I mentioned earlier, if a nap is what I need, then Lilly is absolutely invited.

I still feel like we’re in a deep hole, but we’re making the best of it.

** I started to write a whole thing about fitting in time to workout and trying hard to eat right, but you’ve heard all that before, I’m sure. Instead, here are the two things that REALLY keep me afloat in tough times. **

Mandatory Snuggle Time
Long ago in our love story (tomorrow is the 22nd anniversary of our first date), we instituted Mandatory Snuggle Time. Because Tom works harder than anyone I know, about the ONLY time he isn’t running around is in the morning when he first wakes up. So, if a girl needs to cuddle, that’s the time to do it.

(We like to pretend we still look this young, but … you know.)

Lilly, on the other hand, is often snuggliest in the evening. So, we head to bed long before the boys and get in at least an hour of one-on-one comfort each night.

Thankfully, Ginko is pretty much willing to snuggle any time I am. As I’ve said before, his answer to nearly any question is “Yes.”

The Magic Chocolate Pie
I frequently use this pie to handle stress, to send Get Well wishes to friends and neighbors, and to celebrate any occasion (big or small). Essentially, it’s monster chocolate, topped with creamy chocolate, topped with chocolate mousse, topped with whipped cream. (Here’s a little secret about me: I believe dessert comes in one and only one form — chocolate.)

Magic Chocolate (Coping) Pie

3 squares baker’s semi-sweet chocolate (melted)
1/4 cup canned sweetened condensed milk
1 chocolate cookie pie crust (pre-made)
1/2 cup chopped nuts (whatever makes you happy)
2 cups of milk
2 packages (3.9 oz each) of chocolate instant pudding
1 tub (8 oz) of whipped topping (thawed & divided)

Mix the melted chocolate and condensed milk. Pour into crust, and sprinkle with nuts.

Beat milk and pudding mix (whisk or mixer) for 2 minutes, then spoon half of it into the pie shell.

Stir half of the whipped topping into the remaining pudding, then spoon it on top of the full-strength pudding.

Top with the remaining whipped topping and chocolate shavings for flair.

Refrigerate for 3 hours.

My initial strategy was to use the yoga preventive I’d learned a decade or more ago, where you sit in Virasana (basically, kneel and sit back between your heels) and use your knuckles to really dig into your feet from heel to toe.

But, I did it so much and dug in so hard that I tore the skin off my knuckles. Eeek.

So, I turned to this handy-dandy massage tool I bought eons ago.

Basically, I use just one of the knobs and a whole lot of pressure to really dig into the channels on the bottom of my foot. It hurts and builds some heat, increases circulation, etc.

I’m not going to tell that you that I have ZERO pain, but it helps a lot. I typically dig in for 15-30 minutes per day, when my feet really hurt.

Dogs most easily find smells in the butyric acid category (earthy smells, sweat smells), which BEER mimics quite well. Wine and other liquor can work as well. Based on scent alone, in fact, you could teach a dog to alert to only one kind of beer (over others). The second scent to try, I’m told, is a lightly perfumed lotion or something similar. After that, you can move on to people, but avoid cleaners (too strong) and avoid food (dogs may try to eat it rather than use their noses).

But, we’re still on beer.

The expert I interviewed suggested putting a little scent on a cotton ball and then the cotton ball inside a container with holes in the lid. Easy enough, right? Get a clicker. Click for the dog noticing the scented object.

Well, we’re working on getting Lilly to notice the scent, but I’m not sure she gets the game yet because she usually picks up the container. Once she was doing that consistently, I added a second identical container and rewarded her for goign to the correct one.

Is she using her nose? I honestly don’t know.

I tried those plastic party cups, with the cotton ball taped inside, so that the cup made a nice cone of smell for her to find.

I tried putting a cotton ball inside a cardboard tube with the ends taped, but punctured.

Next, I tried a bigger yogurt container. Thinking it might be big enough she’ll be less likely to pick it up, but she’s still just pushing the container around or trying to pick it up, so I don’t think she gets it yet.

I’ve abandoned the two containers for now, and I’m back to working with just one until I think she understands.

I shot some video yesterday, but learning how to edit takes a lot of time. Tic-toc. Tic-toc. So, give me a couple days to figure out how to do a compilation of clips so that you don’t have to watch the whole thing. I’ve figured out how to make one clip from a video recording, but now I have to figure out how to do more and then stick them all together. *sigh*

While it’s fun, the techno learning curve also gives me a bit of a headache — between the thinking, the computer screen, and (lately) the glare off the snow outside the windows.

Stay tuned. Offer scent shaping advice. Anything. )

***
Just got a note from Gigi (our trainer) recommending this book:
Fun Nosework for Dogs

Might have to get that OR find a way to attach the scent containers to the floor.

As I noted then, on paper, these protocols seem overwhelming. To help myself, I created these audio files so that I could listen to them on my iPod while I did the training work with Lilly. I can tell from blog traffic statistics that people all over the world continue to access them.

The Relaxation Protocol: A quick recap
The original protocol developed decades ago has been updated and modified by various animal behaviorists. Dr. Karen Overall developed the version upon which these audio files were created. Simply right-click on each one and select Save Link As in order to save the MP3 audio file onto your computer.

Our Experience
We did weeks and weeks of this 15-day routine in 2007 and early 2008, where we did the whole series in a bunch of different locations. Then in mid-2008, our own behaviorist gave me a detailed behavior modification plan with similar protocols better tailored to Lilly’s fears, including certain moving objects, all manner of noises, strange people of all shapes and sizes, and dogs of all kinds. It took us months to get through each stage completely. Now, we’re using similar strategies in real-life scenarios to continue our progress of building Lilly’s ability to handle any Sudden Environmental Change (SEC) we experience when we’re in public. SEC is just a fancy way of saying something changes that could possibly freak Lilly out.

Early on, working on my own, I let Lilly lay down if she wanted to, but once we started working with our behaviorist, she really wanted me to get Lilly to SIT since a very specific form of laying down (kind of like this recent dog show video) is a “shut down” behavior for Lilly, and we wanted to avoid rewarding that accidentally. Plus, we wanted to keep her working from her thinking brain, not her fear brain, and making a decision to SIT helps with that.

Look at Training Updates and other posts from July 2008 forward to follow our ongoing saga. If you’re new or catching up, our treatment plan includes clomipramine and alprazolam to help Lilly cope with her fears. The whole medication story is filed under Dogs on Drugs.

***

But, first my mini-rant. Two things that bug me!

1. People who ignore their dogs on walks.

Now, I understand that my fellow rural types enjoy leisurely outings, where it’s enough to just walk through our valleys, up our mountains, across our creeks. I’m not talking about that nearly meditative experience of togetherness. I’m not (for once) talking about people who have NO IDEA what’s on the end of the leash and thereby allow their dogs to be rude or menacing.

I’m talking about people who are either on the phone, chatting with someone else, or just plodding along with no regard for the dog’s presence.

Maybe I’m too “me,” but walks serve many purposes for us. Sure, it’s absolutely exercise for both of us. Many times, it’s just the joy of being together. But, often, I keep Lilly working during our walks. In part, I strive to keep her from being bored, but … especially when we are in town, which is much noisier and scarier to Lilly … I keep her focused to control her fear better. Even if I just ask WATCH ME as we pass people or dogs, it helps Lilly cope.

So, perhaps to others, I look like the crazy chattering lady who talks a LOT to her dog and hands food over like a human PEZ dispenser, but I see them, and I think … Geez! Give that dog a little social interaction. Merely being connected by a leash isn’t enough.

2. People who use harsh methods with any dog, but especially puppies.

I watched two young women (late teens, early 20s) jerk a small, young pup up and down the path on Saturday. I have no idea on breed mix, but I’m guessing based on coloring and a docked tail, it might have had some Rottie. The poor little sweetie looked about 10 weeks old, tops. And, she was wearing a choke collar.

This was a doh-dee-doh kind of puppy. Not unruly at all. Probably too young to be very unruly anyway. Nonetheless, it required a choke collar apparently for “control.”

Anytime, this sweet pup showed any interest at all at anything, even just sniffing along the trail, it received a sharp jerk on the collar. It made me so sad.

People call animal communicators “pet psychics,” but there’s no psychic ability involved. Instead, animal communication is a form of telepathic meditation. “Everybody has this ability. It is innate,” says Anna Twinney, who did sessions noted above with Lilly. “Really, you’re not so much learning to communicate with animals as you are unlearning to ignore the messages.”

Don’t expect to hear voices, however. You may see images or feel rushes of emotion or pain. “You know it’s not coming from you when one moment you’re fine and the next moment you’re completely anxious or upset or happy or hurting,” Twinney says.

I haven’t tried to do this in a long time, but back when I was working at it regularly, I had the funniest experience. I was laying in bed one morning, sort of half awake, when I tried to connect with Lilly. All of a sudden, an image of a mouse popped into my mind and I had the urge to laugh out loud.